Every meal an adventure

There comes a moment when you've been gnawing on a piece of grisly or fatty meat for several minutes that you just have to take a chance and swallow. You hope that the minutes you've spent grinding away at it have lubricated it with enough saliva to prevent you from choking in front of a table full of Paraguayans because that would just add to the list of embarrassing things you've done lately. The time has come. You decide to take the plunge. 3...2...1...gulp. Gulp again. Success! You look down at your plate. Crap. Another hunk of fat, and the adventure continues.

October Update

I got kicked out of my house. It's a really long, ridiculous story that I have been telling to Paraguayans and Americans nonstop for the past week and I don't really want to go into it again but basically the landlady, who lives in Asuncion and hasn't even seen the house in over 5 years, was on a very different page as everyone else and frankly and little bit off her rocker.

The good news is I have found an excellent new house right next to where Elvio works and the lady who owns it said I could stay there for free until I leave. My neighbor came over yesterday and told me how sad she is to see me go. She said that I am like another daughter to her and it hurt her heart that someone could treat me that way. So that was nice to hear, even though I am only going to the next street over and will probably still see her everyday. I will put up pictures of the house when I have some more time; I'm going to start moving everything today!

Work-wise, I'm still as busy as ever. This past week I took toothbrushes and toothpaste to the school again. Last year I did the same but let the kids take them home and soon they were lost, or had fallen on the ground, or were used by all 12 members of the family. So this year I took a new approach and got the teachers more involved. We decided that each class would get a large tube of toothpaste and the students would leave their brushes at school. When the arrive, they'll brush their teeth and then again after snack/recess. So far it's worked out well; the only problem being that the 5th and 6th graders want to put their own toothpaste on and end up using way too much :).

My large project is slowly moving along too. At the last parent meeting I had 33 families sign up to participate in a sanitary latrine project. This means they either don't have a bathroom at all or their latrine now has a floor made of wood, leaves, or whatever else they could find. I've been working with the NGO PLAN International and the director thinks that he can get cement floors for all those families. He is going to contact the National Sanitation Service and let me know how that goes. So far I've been calling him everyday for a week and he hasn't done it yet but I'll keep being a thorn in his side until we get our latrines.

I'd like to end with a picture. Peace Corps is really frustrating sometimes and it seems like lately I've had more bad days than good but this makes it all worth it:

New Directions

Life in Peace Corps is rarely easy or simple.

Let me start by saying that my last project idea, the recycling thing, failed miserably. No one was interested and I learned a long time ago that you can't force people to change if they don't want to. I managed to give a charla on the importance of garbage pits and separating your trash, not burning plastic, that sort of thing and they actually dug a giant garbage pit in Conavi but that's as far as it went. Recycling is still a pretty foreign thing here so for now I'll just lead by example and leave it at that.

Anyway, a while ago, my VAC (group of volunteers who live near each other) received money from a grant to build 2 fogones, wood-burning stoves, in each site. I built my first one last week with the help of another volunteer and it turned out great. I went back to the woman's house and baked chipa guasu, a delicious cheesy cornbread-type bread, with her. She had never baked anything in her own home before and was so excited.

While we were building we had several people come by the house and watch. I've built fogones in other sites before but never in my own so I don't think people knew that I could actually build things. So this got me thinking about another project. I won't talk about all the details now, in case it also fails, because that would just be sad. But this time I have talked to several community leaders and they are on board and willing to help me. I set up a meeting with the Parent's Commission but the director of the school "forgot" to tell people about it. He rescheduled it for a day when I have to go to Asuncion and said he would talk to the Commission for me. I'm nervous that he'll find some to mess that up but there's nothing I can do about it. 

It's taken a year and half for people here to realize that I do have skills and resources to help them. Every project I have tried to do has been a struggle against people who don't want to work together or lack of resources or people just not being interested. I've been told to my face and behind my back that I am worthless and have done nothing for anyone since I got here. Usually the people saying those things either don't live in the community at all or are rich and have nicer things compared to everyone else. It seems like I've been fighting to help these people since the day I got here and I don't know why.

It would be so easy to just give up and hang out for the last 7 months. I'm getting married, I could just enjoy being a housewife for a while. But that's not why I'm here. So I'm not going to give up. I'm going to fight for this project to succeed. And if this one doesn't, I'll start another one.

Update and *Special Request*

This past week my boss came to visit my site for her 1-year visit. I've actually been in site for a year and 3 months but there are a lot of health volunteers so it took a while for her to get out here.

We met with the director of my school and talked about future projects and how to best take advantage of the time I have left. It's hard to believe but I only have 8 months left! We talked about getting a project started with the government housing community (Conavi) near the school to organize garbage pits and a recycling program. Right now they all just throw their garbage in their yards or out in the fields and other members of the community are starting to complain. There is a guy in a truck that buys plastics and glass a few times every month so they next time he passes my house I'm going to talk to him about going out to Conavi too. There are 3 lines of houses in the community so each line will be responsible for building their garbage pit and they'll get 2 oil drums for plastics and glass. The director already had a meeting with the community members and they seem excited about the project.

I'm also trying to plan a wedding which is in 3 months (AH!). Our guest list started at 50, then doubled, then tripled as Elvio kept remembering that his family is enormous. Paraguayans don't plan anything until the last minute but I thought that maybe a wedding would be different. It's not. We've talked about it plenty but no concrete plans have been made, no one has been hired. The ring order only has to be done 8 days in advance and the judge only needs a week's notice. As someone who likes to plan things in detail, this is extremely stressful for me.

We do have our honeymoon planned though! Elvio has family in Mendoza, Argentina (wine country!) and they rent cabins on their ranch. Here is their website for anyone who's interested: http://www.fincalunadeplata.com.ar/. Elvio worked their for 3 years, he's even in a few of the photos on the website. Anyway, they told us that they are for sure coming to the wedding and they we can ride back to Mendoza with them afterwards for the honeymoon.

So that's the update part of the post, here is the part where I ask you for things! I heard that Borders is going out of business and my school library is really lacking in materials. The kids at my school love when I read to them and when they get to have books to read but I only have like 3 books and really, you can only read about the Adventures of Senor Toothbrush so many times. So, we would really appreciate it if you happen to find any children's books in Spanish if you could send them my way. I saw a few Curious George books in Spanish on their website among others. I know that shipping costs are high but a few softcover books shouldn't be too heavy and my kids would love them. Thank you so much!

Oh the Weather Outside…and Inside…is Frightful

Winter is officially here. Asunción recorded an all-time low yesterday of -1.2°C (29.8°F). That doesn’t seem so bad when you can escape to a heated house, heated car, heated school or office. But here there is no central heating. Many houses are made of wood so the temperature outside is the temperature inside. Showers are horrible ordeals that only happen when absolutely necessary.

Although the sun comes up earlier in the winter, activity doesn’t start until later. People stay huddled in their beds or around fires until the frost disappears and the morning chill wears off a bit. The fire is kept going all day as water is constantly boiling for hot mate.

Winter break is coming up in July. Last year it was extended by a week because it was so cold, which seems very likely to happen again this year. I’m planning a week-long winter camp with the 5^th and 6^th graders at my school. We’ll do activities on nutrition, gardening, hand washing and personal hygiene. I’m excited; this group of kids is awesome. They are always the most willing to participate when I give charlas at the school and I’m eager to get them doing more hands-on activities that they can take how and teach their families.

In other news, Elvio and I went to Asunción on Monday to turn in paperwork to send to Washington so we can get married. He got to see the Peace Corps office and meet some of the people that work there so that was cool. I left my cell phone on the bus on the way there. I was able to get a new one but I’ve lost all my phone numbers, including ones of people back home. So if I had your number before, or if you just want to text me, you can e-mail me a text at 984610026@tigo.com.py. This is more convenient than using their website. Thanks!

Announcement

I have a very important announcement to make so listen up! Also, you may want to sit down for this. And make yourself a strong drink.

I'm getting married!! Wait...what? Yes you read correctly. I have met "the one" and we can't wait to spend the rest of our lives together. You're probably wondering why you have heard next to nothing about this guy. Well, I have limited internet time and I like to blog about my work, not my love life. But here is some background:

My fiance's name is Elvio Santander. He is 27 years old and lives on a ranch with his family a few miles outside of my town. It's traditional for children to continue living with their families until they get married, and sometimes afterwards too. Anyway, we met last year at a festival in my community. He had been texting me already and I thought he was a creep like all the other guys that texted me. But unlike other texts I received, which were raunchy and gross, his were sweet. Like "you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." and "do you like chicken soup? I would love to cook for you sometime.". Haha. I found out later that he was getting advice from his 17-year-old sister on what to say to me because he was terrified. After we met, I mentioned that I was starting a garden and had no idea what I was doing. He came over the next day with his cousin and we spent 2 days setting up my garden. It turned out beautifully and that led to other projects like building my shower room, latrine, pig house and cleaning up my yard. We spent the afternoons drinking terere and getting to know each other.

I spent Christmas and New Years with his family and despite only having known him for a month, I felt accepted and at home with them. I had dengue during that time too and they all pitched in to take care of me and make sure I wasn't too miserable. By that time his family members were already asking us when we were going to get married but I just laughed it off. Over the next couple of months I didn't think it was going to work out, to be completely honest. We had a lot to overcome being from different cultures and both of us not speaking our native language (he prefers speaking Guarani but we speak Spanish to each other). We had several fights that really just came down to miscommunications and cultural differences. But we got through it and we're a stronger couple because of it.

Then my parents came. He and I had already talked about getting married but the problem was that I didn't want to stay here in Paraguay and he said he was scared to go to the United States. He had only ever left Paraguay once to work in Mendoza, Argentina for 3 years with his aunt so being scared is natural. It seemed like marriage wasn't going to be possible but the thought of us breaking up and me leaving was unbearable for both of us too. When my parents came, we spent a day out at his ranch and he got to spend a lot of time with them. They couldn't speak to each other but they figured out ways to communicate. I think he realized then that Americans aren't as scary as he thought. He also got to go to Buenos Aires with us, which was amazing. He had only ever seen the city from a bus window passing through. Seeing him ride an escalator for the first time is something I will never forget :). It was a great opportunity for him to see what else is out there in the world. We also got to meet up with some of his family that lives in Buenos Aires so that was awesome.

After that we began talking seriously about getting married and decided that although it will be hard (any marriage is difficult), it will be so worth it. So here is the plan:

It is a lot easier to get a visa to the US for a spouse than for a fiance so we are going to get married here in Paraguay. In order to do that I have to fill out a bunch of paperwork to send to Peace Corps/Washington and get their OK, which should take 3 months. So our date is set for November 19th, which gives us a little extra time but doesn't get so far into summer that it'll be too hot to think. We are doing a civil ceremony here at his house with his family, some of my volunteer friends and a few people from Peace Corps as witnesses. We're going to try to have someone film it too for everyone back home. Then, once we're back in the States we'll have another ceremony for my family and friends since they won't be able to come here.

Elvio is starting English classes with a volunteer friend of mine this next week. He also got a full-time job last month and we've started saving up money for his passport, visa and plane ticket back to the US (mine is all paid for by Peace Corps thankfully).

I know this probably comes as a shock to a lot of you because I'm not able to keep in touch very well and you all haven't even met this guy. But I have no doubt in my mind that this is right for me. I am so happy and excited and when we're together we keep looking at each and burst out laughing and say "we're getting married!!". And I know that once you meet Elvio you will know what I mean.

Vacation

It's been pointed out that I haven't updated in a really long time. Sorry about that. To be honest I haven't updated because I haven't felt like I've done anything in a long time. I spent the month of April mostly preparing for my parents arrival on April 30. I tried to look at my house from an American perspective and it freaked me out a little bit that my parents would soon be seeing the way I've been living for the past year. It's not bad or anything, I have electricity and running water, but it's definitely different than what their used to. So I finally put a roof on my latrine and brought a guy in the put hot water in my shower and I think those things helped a lot.

Also in April I went to Asunción for my 1-year medical exams and In-Service Training. All of us were shocked to hear that a year from that day (April 26th) would be our last days as volunteers. The time is flying by so quickly, I still can't quite believe that a year has already passed in my site. We talked about all the things we have accomplished in our sites and all the things we still want to do. There is still much work to be done.

My parents arrived right after that training in April 30. That hour waiting for them in the airport was the most stressful hour of my life. But the minute I saw their faces, the past 15 months apart didn't matter anymore, it's like it never happened. We were together again and it was amazing. I couldn't believe that they were finally here. We spent a few days in Asunción where I was ridiculously restless and ready to get back to site and show them where I live and have them meet everyone.

Once in site they got to meet my neighbors, who let me live with them for 3 months when I first got there and take care of me when I'm sick or have any kind of problem and are there for me whenever I need it. I asked my host mom one morning if she could help me kill my pig and she said, "But you don't know how to kill a pig. Let me talk to my husband and we'll get everything ready." They spent their entire day with my parents and I slaughtering my pig, when they may have had something else planned. We spent a day at my boyfriend's house with his family and ate a delicious meal (thank you for your sacrifice piggy) and just hung out. I'm used to hanging out and not understanding everything that's going on but that's new for my parents. They've told me since then that they miss terere circles and just hanging out with family. It's definitely something that doesn't happen enough in the United States.

After a really long and complicated series of bus rides, we made it to Buenos Aires and our gorgeous apartment. I was expecting to have some culture shock but it wasn't that bad. I was amazed by things like elevators and coffee makers and so many tall, tall buildings but I was surprised at how quickly I got used to it all again. Well sort of. I got used to it, but I still felt separate from it. I used to love to shop. We did a ton of walking in the city and we walked passed so many store windows where before I would have been drawn in, now I hardly gave them a second glance. It helps that I'm living in minimum wage in a developing country but it's not just that. I am surrounded by people everyday that live on next to nothing and they get by and they are happy with what they have. And me, I have boxes and boxes of stuff in the US that my parents are saving for me that I realize now is so unnecessary.

Speeches aside, Buenos Aires was amazing. I allowed myself to take a break from Peace Corps and relax. We ate good food, drank good wine and saw the sites. My boyfriend has family close to the city and I was lucky enough to be able to meet up with them to celebrate his cousin's 30th birthday. I had met some of them when they came to visit Paraguay for New Year's so it was good to see them again. My parents left from Buenos Aires and I got on a bus back to Paraguay.

I'm so glad my parents got the chance to visit. They had never been out of the country and now I think they feel a lot better about their daughter living in Paraguay now that they've seen my home and met the people that I call family down here.

So now it's time to get back into the swing of things. I was really sick this past week with what the first doctor said was stomach flu and what the second said was either parasites or an infection. All I know is, it was not pretty. This past Friday, the volunteers in my department had an event in town for International Environment Day where we put up posters about various environmental issues, handed out fliers and seeds. We didn't have as big of a crowd as we had wanted but it's a learning process and we'll do better next time. This week I'm going in for a meeting with my boss, one we have every 4 months to talk about what I've done in site and what I'm planning to do so hopefully that'll get me out of vacation mode and back into work mode.